10 Ways To Feel Like Your Best Self

Finding self-confidence can be a difficult task for many, especially those who have experienced criticism or judgment from others.  Over time, these messages can be internalized and become the self-talk that we feed ourselves.  If you are struggling with low self-esteem you are not alone.  Below are some tips to naturally enhance self-worth and create a more positive outlook on life.

·         Mindfulness: Noticing and demonstrating curiosity about our self-talk is the first step to enhancing self-esteem.  Take a moment each day to check in with yourself and ask yourself the following question: Am I giving myself mostly positive or negative messages? Try to answer this question without judgment; if you notice that your thoughts tend to be negative, that’s ok! Becoming familiar with your inner voice is the first step.

·         Changing the story: Many of us are our own toughest critic.  When we notice that we are feeding ourselves negative messages (also known as Automatic Negative Thoughts or ANTS), we can then start rewriting the story.  Try finding three positive aspects of the situation and write them down to remember for later.  Over time you will find that you naturally seek the positives rather than the negatives.

·         Practicing Acceptance: Many times, there are things that happen to us that we have little to no control over, such as other people’s behaviors.  If you find yourself in a situation where this is the case, practicing radical acceptance is key.  Find a song or mantra like “It is what it is” that speaks to you and can help you through a difficult situation.

·         Giving and Receiving Compliments: Make a list of traits you like about yourself or compliments that you have received from others.  Put this list somewhere visible like the bathroom mirror or in your wallet so you can be reminded daily of all the things that make you wonderful!

·         Self-Care Routine that attends to Nutritional, Sleep, and Exercise Needs: When we take care of our physical needs, our mental wellbeing is naturally enhanced.  Drinking more water, getting 7-9 hours of sleep, and taking a walk can do wonders for our mood. Set small, achievable goals regarding diet, sleep, and exercise to enhance feelings of success.

·         Giving Back to the Community: Many people find comfort and joy taking part in an activity that improves the environment or community with others who share the same passion.  Spending a few hours per week giving back to the community by volunteering, donating goods, or giving to charity is a great way to enhance our planet and our self-esteem.

·         Forgiveness: It can be easy to carry anger, sadness, and guilt when we make a mistake or are on the receiving end of bad situation.  Carrying these negative feelings in our back pocket can make it difficult to move forward mentally and emotionally.  For many, holding a closure ceremony can release these feelings.  Writing a letter to ourselves or others, connecting with nature, or extending a hand to make amends are great ways to promote forgiveness.

·         Recognize Self Worth: Take a moment to connect with yourself to determine a sense of purpose and meaning.  Find what makes you special or different from those around you and then do things that enhance that feeling of worth.  When you can tap into that inner spark, anything is possible!

·         Unplug and Recharge: We are consistently bombarded with negative news stories, pictures of others on our feed, and the newest trends. All of this input and information can lead to feeling overwhelmed, hopeless, and pessimistic.  Every once in awhile challenge yourself to take a hiatus from your devices and do an activity that recharges your soul like going into nature, connecting with your loved ones, or adventuring in a place with no Wifi.  We don’t let our phones get down to 1% battery, so make sure you are making time to recharge yourself too.

·         Try something new: Let your imagination run wild with this one!  Cook a new recipe, sign up for a dance class, do a wine and paint night, grow an herb garden, throw some pottery-anything!  Brain science studies show that when an outcome is better than we expected we are rewarded with a surge of dopamine: the chemical that makes us feel happy and fulfilled. Trying something new and finding that you like it or are good at it may be just the boost you’re needing.

Reference:

Abrams, A. (2017). 8 Steps to improving your self-esteem.  Retrieved August 22, 2018 from https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/nurturing-self-compassion/201703/8-steps-improving-your-self-esteem

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